Low expectations can pay off, though not always. I limboed my way into Moana (2026) thanks to a one-sentence review spotted in the digital wilds. It said, “Somehow Disney miscast the Rock as the Rock.” After seeing the movie, that review is unfortunately spot on. Kudos to you, internet.
In the 2016 animated film, Maui is a fleet-footed, flexible, and affable anti-hero. In the 2026 film, Maui is the Rock. He’s stiff and somewhat expressionless beyond his friendly, teeth-whitened smile. What the role needs, though, is comedic plasticity. Not muscular plasticity.
Everything on screen feels a little too Disney. It’s a vibe that can pay off in animation. Not in live action. Sets are too well lit. Actors are too smiley. Vocals are too auto-tuned. Backgrounds are too green screened. Parents are too alive.
Actually, that last one is a deviation from the Disney norm that I liked about the original story. The parents are alive. The father is stubborn like the sea, blocking Moana from escaping her small town life. The mother adapts to Moana’s needs like a seasoned sailor, helping her set out to find her way.
The live-action film mostly sticks to the script, peppering in a few ad-libs and new jokes. The exposition-heavy opening scene is grander — it feels a lot like the Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring open, except narrated by Moana’s grandmother (Rena Owen, who is fantastic). You see it and you start to think, things could get interesting. Spoiler: They don’t.
One glaring omission is the Realm of Monsters. In the animated film, Moana is confronted by its creepy denizens. The remake skips it almost entirely. This was an opportunity to shade us from the glaring Disney sunshine that permeates the film. It was the kind of unexpected but appreciated scene that made the first film a classic.
Disney should have taken more chances with the live-action remake. Recast a young star as Maui. Write new and better jokes. Allow the Indigenous instruments and voices to sound natural. Use actual sailors instead of jarring CGI for basic boating shots. Fill the Realm of Monsters with actual monsters!
A live-action Moana sailed into theaters about two decades too early. A properly planned film should be aimed at parents in 2046 who grew up with the original and want their kids to share the experience. Instead, the film was rushed into theaters in an attempt to appease shareholders. It failed.
What a shame, because it’s obvious an incredible amount of work went into the film. The CG art is beautiful — you see it in frayed ropes, wind-swaying fronds, and textured coconuts. And Te Fiti in all of her forms is a powerful presence. The animation is treated with expert care. Imagine those skills and resources used on a new live-action story.
Moana (2026) is not horrible. It’s a little pointless. But it’s not a poorly made film. If your kids demand it on family movie night, pour yourself a cocktail, make it stiff, drop in a tiny umbrella, and kick back. Like being on the ocean, ride the wave. Don’t fight it. And think of the bright side — you don’t need to hit pause to shake up a refill because you’ve already seen 99.75% of this film.
Where to watch
Rating: PG (Me: 5+)
Director: Thomas Kail
Starring: Catherine Lagaʻaia, Dwayne Johnson, John Tui, Frankie Adams, Rena Owen
Run time: 1hr 55m
Post-credits scenes: None. But the credits do introduce a new song.
Bathroom breaks: Whenever.
Sequel? Unlikely.
If you liked Moana (2026), check out these films:
- Moana (2016) (5+)
- Lilo & Stitch (2002) (5+)
- Vai (2019) (9+)
- Whale Rider (2002) (8+)
- Raya and the Last Dragon (2021) (6+)
- The Sea Beast (2022) (7+)
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